The past two years of my life have been horrific. Two major issues came crashing down on my family and hung over us like dark rain clouds. There were days I felt paralyzed in fear. DD was a great distraction but I just could not possibly focus on my submission when I was having to be SO STRONG every minute. It was a complete disaster trying to embody both strength and submission in my own head. Maybe others can work that out, but I just couldn't. And I felt alone. I felt like no one could possibly understand what it was like to be facing such a massive giant, let alone two at once, like I was. I looked around at friends and family and envied their complaints about issues like money or weight loss. I questioned why me a thousand times.
So these two particular issues had no known expiration date. The future looked dim and I was depressed. But then, like a lightning bolt straight to my heart I received a phone call one day. It was a miracle, a MIRACLE BEYOND MIRACLES, and issue number one....my horrific nightmare, was suddenly, unexpectedly....O-V-E-R! I actually dropped to my knees and began sobbing the most wonderful warm tears of joy I've ever felt. I thanked God and I called my family one by one sharing the news. That day was a wonderful blur of thankfulness and joy. I feel like I have been an almost different person since that day. Stress is a very real thing and can remove you from the person you truly are. I am testament to that!
So yes, issue number two still remains. But now I have hope. Because when I tell you issue number one was at one time hope-LESS, I do not lie. Yay for life! Yay for hope!
And by the way YAY because I can now focus on my husband, and that my friends will surely bring some exciting days ahead!